you said move on (where do i go)

title:
date: Sunday, February 19, 2006
time:1:27 PM

Why is it OVER?

Growing up is not something simple for a teenage gal like me. We, gals, always depend on someone like a god-brother or a god- sis to keep us whole. They are important people as we grow older and older. But what happens when someone u love and care like a god-bro, decide to hurt himself again and again. You would definitely get angry. This is the same prob tt i am facing. I have a loving, smart, adorable, caring, polite and charming god-bro. We met in secondary school and he is 2 years older. He ws introduced by his gf who is my netball teammate. We first became good friends then he became my god-bro. He was everything to me and all i wanted was for him to be happy. But i don think so he knws tt. And till now, he still don knw how i feel. But all i can say rite now is tt, Abang, You are everything to me. This song is goin out to my bro tt i have not seen for so long and the bro tt i care for so much! :(

"Over"

by Lindsay Lohan

I watched the walls around me crumble

But its not like I won't build them up again

So here's your last chance for redemption

So take it while it lasts because it will end

And my tears are turning into time I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye

I cant live without you

Can't breathe without you I dream about you honestly

Tell me that its over

Because if the world is spinning and I'm still living

It wont be right if were not in it together

Tell me that it's over

And I'll be the first to go

Don't want to be the last to know

I won't be the one to chase you

But at the same time you're the heart that I call home

I'm always stuck with these emotions

And the more I try to feel the less I'm whole

My tears are turning into time

I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye

My tears are turning into time

I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye

Tell me that it's over

Over

Honestly tell me

Don't tell me that its over

Don't tell me that its over..

This song means alot to me. I hear it whenever my bro is in trouble. I hope tt my bro and me is not OVER!

I really hope so. :(

title:
date: Thursday, February 16, 2006
time:4:14 PM

Happy Valentines Day To Everyone! :)

Valentines Day is suppose to be a day when both parties spent time togather without anyone there to disturb them. But not for me. I spent my valentimes playing netball wif my gals. It did not really matter to me bcox almost every year it is the same to me. I don ever get to spent it wif amrit. Sometimes i wonder. Is it bcox i don wan to be hurt again like the last time or is it bcox i jus don wan to spent time at all. I can neve make up my mind! I hate being alone on valentines day. The one reason is bcox it is VALENTINES DAY!! The other reason is bcox i don like to remember the past. I rememeber the times when i use to spent wif farhan and the times he use to push me around. I rememeber the times when i was his pouching bag and the times he would scold me without any reason. The times he use to make me look like a fool and the times he jus don care! He neve did love me bcox if he did, he wont do the things he did to me. The times i cried by myself and the times i jus felt like dying. The times when i weak and i always needed someone to pick me up. I was shattered into pieces and i felt like a broken mirror. Nobody dared to pick me up bcox they were afraid to be cursed for the next 7 years! I always thought tt there wont be anyone for me. I jus wanted to be left alone! My hopes and dreams were destroyed and now i don have any. But everything changed. I found for myself a brave and strong "prince". haha! I hope nothing would go wrong wif this one. I already have hopes and dreams for this relationship and i don want to destroy it. Bcox i knw he wont! :) Hmmm.. Anyway i was updating my blog and at the same time i am chatting wif shalih. It has been a long time since i talked to him and saw him. I think he will be visiting my blog later. SO...

Take Care Shalih! :)

title:
date: Sunday, February 12, 2006
time:10:59 AM

I HAD A GREAT TIME YESTERDAY! :)

I am so exhausted bcox yesterday i went to mr low's condo for a small gathering by the new zealand group.

It was fun but then the girls were not allowed to go into the pool as we were not in proper attire.

Haha.

All of us were so bored so in the end we played "Catching".

It was so fun but then the Guard who told us tt we could play in the pool also told us tt we could not play catching at all.

He realli ruined our day!

In the end, we changed to dryer clothes and got ready for the food to arrive.

Ms Chng, Mr Eddie Lim, Mr Low, Mrs Chua, Mr Chua, Ms Yip and some kids were there.

The pizza arrived late but thank god it arrived.

All of us were dead HUNGRY!

It was Ms Chua's Birthday so we wished her Happy B'day.

Presented her a present and also to Mr LOW and to Jacob.

Then we all ate our life's out!

Hahaha!

It was so fun being able to spent this day wif the ppl tt was wif me at the New Zealand trip.

As we all ate, the old memories came back to life and we all missed it so much.

The more we talked abt it, the more we want to go again.

It was an emotional day for me but i had fun at the same time.

After lunch, we exchanged presents from our secret valentine.

My secret valentine was Zhi Wei!

He tricked me!

Then it was time to leave!

But before i went home.

Me, ros, nurul and tessa went to town to support our skool dancers!

We arrived there by taxi.

When we arrived, the crowd was amazing!

We met some of our sec 1's.

Our skool was great but they could not be compared to the rest.

The school tt really caught all our attention was CHIJ Tanjong Katong!

They were amazing!

Congratulations to Adam for passing his O'Levels wif 22 points!

Terence. Don worry about ur points. You still have me to support u! :)

title:
date: Thursday, February 09, 2006
time:3:58 PM

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO TASH, NIK & ME!

There was nothing special abt my b'day.

The onli ppl tt made me special were my friends in skool but not my family.

There were presents from my friends and they were realli nice.

Love them all to death.

Amrit lied to me and told me tt he forgot to bring my present.

How could he?

But in the end, i found my present in my locker and it was BEAUTIFUL!

It was a Billabong wallet.

Then my netball team went for our last match.

We lost AGAIN, but i am still proud of my gals.

They have played so hard for all the matches and they neve gave up.

They improved so much and i cant wait to see wat else they can do.

After the match, we went to Thomson Plaza for dinner.

We ate at Pizza Hut and the gals were making us laugh all the way.

Then after the whole meal, TWO birthday cakes were on the table.

One of it was from Cindy and Huiyian & Renuka.

We blew out the candles and everyone started rushing for the choc cake.

I did not stay long bcox i had to go but in the end we jus sat down for a while and then we went of.

The netball gals made my birthday very memorable but not the ppl i love.

My abang Terence, did not even greet me happy b'day.

Probably he forgot, tt is okiie but i will neve forgive him for msgin tt gal.

It took him so long to forget her and now he is msging her again.

I tried so hard to help him but he got stuck in the trap again.

I am so sick and tired already.

Hais.

Whenever i don msg him, he scoldes me but whenever he msges her it is okiie to him.

What nonsence!

I don knw how to tok to u also.

Ever since u graduate, u neve tell me anything.

The way u msg her tt day was disturbing!

U wan to knw how i knw!

I READ the msg!

I don think u care abt any of us so don bother anymore!!!!

title:
date: Tuesday, February 07, 2006
time:5:22 PM

Hey guys..
Back finally to update my blog..
This past fews things tt have been happening in skool has really made me reflect on my own behaviour..
I have not had the time to actually stop and think of the things i do and the things i say..
As a leader, u must have followers, then u are considered as a leader..
I did not realise tt the day i became the vice-head, things has been so much harder for me.. Nothing is ever rite nowadays!
For all those who surrendered ur badges to Ms Lim, I am still wondering y u guys did tt..
Don u like being part of this team?
It was also my fault for not speaking up for u guys, i was jus afraid to say something wrong in front of the whole exco group!..
I have worked wif all of u guys and i knw how u guys are and u guys are much better then anyone i use to knw..
But i am so SORRY if i have ruined ur life!
I AM SO SORRY! :(