you said move on (where do i go)

title:
date: Tuesday, March 04, 2008
time:2:22 AM

hey.
firstly, i would like to thank my dearest friends (kasmi&shima&wati) for the wonderful present and beautiful card. you guys really got me this time. i really didnt see it coming. thankQ. you guys shouldn't have too.i really miss u guys. i miss going out with all of you. the fun times we would have. we would never fail to make each other laugh and as usual, shima will never get the joke till the next 5 mins. haha. oh ya, i bought for u guys something already so if you guys going for the sentosa thingy then i will pass to u guys. please go. we have not gone out for like a decade. cant wait to see you guys.

nothing much happened the past few days except the times when i was upset because of that someone. i have been staying home, watchin movies that i neve get to watch and just spent time with my cousin. i rather do this then talk to someone and end up fighting. well, last night stayed up to talk to him again. he said he was looking forward to the conversation. i actually fell a sleep for a while and when i checked my phone, i had 140 missed calls. i was so scared that i immediately called him back. he was out with his friends as usual. we talked (actually he talked more), i just listened. but in the end, we ended up fighting again. i told him that i didnt want to talk about the past but he was so stubborn. you can neve fight with him cause everything to him is about logic. i hate it. he never gets the point that sometimes, whatever u say can hurt me more then your actions. well, that is my life. i'm the punching bag.

amrit.
i know you are reading this once you turn on your laptop. the talk we had yesterday was a mistake. we shouldn't have called each other when we were still angry. you were angry with me & i was angry with you. i didnt know that the word "bye" could make things worst. we have been together for over 3 years and still this things are happening. but after 3 years, the words you use when your angry, is still to much for me to handle. you don't seem to realise that your temper is really bad. i'm trying so hard to plan things for us. meeting up is hard, i know, but at least treat me with some care. i really appreciate your patience and concern whenever we are not fighting. thankQ. let me just summarise whatever i wanted to say yesterday. i'm mad at you because of the things you said. "why you call me when your tired?" , "talking to the wall would be much better" , "its nicer being alone". how do u expect me to react from that. my first instinct is to scream at you but deep down it cut open my heart. my heart was bust open when you said that. so ya. i dont know how to explain to you anymore. its too late, my heart is already busted wide open. loves.